Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep

Thursday, May 08, 2008

great. nobody ever takes me seriously. i was in the fucking car and my mum + aunt drove straight to the fucking mall to eat when they were suppose to drop me off at city hall, whats more infuriating is that they turn around and blame me for not speaking. you people are talking the fuck out of the car how do u expect me to speak when its so messy/chaotic. i didnt know i'm so puny in your eyes

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Ahhh i havent been here for a nong nong time. Feel so stupid when i read my archives, especially so when waiteng mentioned about all the stupid things we did in the past on her blog (micro latios, happee...)

I've been vegetating in my room recently, way much better then taking the 5 mins bus to j8, look for stupid seats at crowded places and try to force truman into the back of your head in such a noisy enviroment.

Lots of things going on this week, lots and lots of emotional struggle.
1) Have been missing out so much on other people's life , so out of touch with everybody. Maybe everybody is just sick of trying, so maybe i should go fuck myself? Can't blame people...
2) Feels like i'm back into the abyss yet again. A stupid dark feeling that comes and goes and it makes you feel worst then shit
3) Thou shalt not hate. Its making me nuts

Lets just face up to the saddening fact that maybe i'm no longer me, all thanks to you

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries

Thursday, March 13, 2008

I've been a wreck this few days. Sorry mind, hands, legs!

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries

Sunday, March 02, 2008

Unconditional love is probably the most powerful thing on earth. I felt it myself, the atmosphere is so wonderful and lovely. I saw my dad cry for the first time. I think it was the first time he hugged me. Everybody else just cried and the sense of unconditional love is undescribable. It felt like as if "love is in the air".

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

I don't know about others, but sometimes I just can't help it but hope something tragic happens to me, something so devastating that everybody's attention would be drawn to me. I'm too used to imagining crazy things; about how i would stand up and speak for myself if someone accused me, about how i would throw a punch across my GKY's face , about how it would be like without certain people in my life, about how it would be like if i died (nothing suicidal, i don't want to die so young). At this very instance, i feel like something tragic should happen to me. I need to create a dramatic scene, enough to draw people's attention. A major something should take place so that people can tell me they want me.

I'm probably too use to having people's attention 24/7, thats why i'm making a big fuss out of the lack it. Yes i'm troublesome, yes i'm hard to pamper. Too bad my dad's sperm and mum's egg made me a guy who is so hard to please. I'm probably exagerrating every single tiny mini bit of truth here so just treat this like any other entry, written by some peter john paul sam in timbaktu(sp?).

I should start doing some mental prep for tomorrow, all the best to myself, me and i. Credits go to the school for making us so stressful and fucked up over life, thank you!

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries

Thursday, February 21, 2008

everything was like a time bomb, now that it has exploded it will probably injure the few others around the bomb. lets hope the bomb is big enough to kill everybody?

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Yes i know i havent been blogging for ages, i just feel so LAzy now that i have a diary with me :D ]

Happy chinese new year everyone, this sunday is probably gonna be the last weekend of chinese new year, gambling wasnt as appealing as last year. I still can remember how i blew 70+50 buxx on a shirt and jeans on impulse with ahmad, and how he didnt stop me from spending my 300bucks just like that. Valentine's day last year was pretty awesome! sorry guys for not joining u guys on the 14th, i wanted to but its late already, sorry :( BTW i have something for u guys, hurry get it from me ! Happy(belated) valentine's day! I dont even knw if such a belated valentine's thingy exist

School is boring, i didnt go for lessons on thursday and friday. I bet Angie wong must be wondering where the hell did i go! OH and i MUST mention learning journey is such a waste of everybody's time. Singapore discovery centre is just a bloody small building, tucked away in jurong (i think ), made to entertain kids.

I feel so out of touch with everybody now, maybe its because ive been missing out on so many outings/gathering, or maybe it is just me

Fuck work, i dont want to do work!

Ill probably pass hair check on monday, i went to cut it fucking short, its so ugly and disgusting. I dont understand why the barber call you handsome boy after cutting your hair. Its probably to comfort you... My zonal finals on monday ZOMGZXC. 245 yck. Lets hope i do well and win amk. fucked up Gky decided to bann ziwei , so i dont knw if he is playing. Thanks to them we have a screwed up team, ill be so fucking pissed off if we lose because of them. Screw discipline.

The game with fairfield on tuesday was quite exciting, i think i did OK. Not exceptional or whatever.

Can u guys feel the heat for o levels? its starting to get warmer and warmer each day, and when it gets too hot for you to handle you will break, so lets toughen up and arm ourselves with shining armour! (i'm just making an honest effort to improve my english)

Cow has a dog at home thats very cute! i watched ''requiem for a dream" and i swear to god it was damn awesome, it is just so beautiful! Am.In.Lv.Wth.It

Off to visit my relatives now, hopefully i will be productive later when we study tgt

Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries